Change is something we all experience, but let’s talk about “changing our minds”. This week Blair and Theresa chat about all things change, and the importance of following your gut and intuition. Changing your mind can feel like being held at gunpoint BUT we are not! They explain how our brains may have us feel the emotions, the pressure, the fear, but ultimately we are FREE to change our minds. Listen as they encourage everyone to own your Energy and make that Power Pivot Move. You get to change your mind! Period.
Enrollment for our 6-month business strategy and mentorship program Momentum is open for cohort 2 starting January 2022. Find out more at https://www.theresalambertcoaching.com/momentum
About the Hosts:
Blair Kaplan Venables is an expert in social media marketing and the president of Blair Kaplan Communications, a British Columbia-based PR agency. As a pioneer in the industry, she brings more than a decade of experience to her clients, which includes global wellness, entertainment, and lifestyle brands. Blair has helped her customers grow their followers into the tens of thousands in just one month, win integrative marketing awards, and more. She has spoken on national stages and her expertise has been featured in media outlets including CBC Radio, CEOWORLD Magazine, She Owns It, and Thrive Global. Blair is also the #1 best-selling author of Pulsing Through My Veins: Raw and Real Stories from an Entrepreneur. When she’s not working on the board for her local chamber of commerce, you can find Blair growing the “I Am Resilient Project,” an online community where users share their stories of overcoming life’s most difficult moments.
Theresa Lambert is a High-Performance Lifestyle and Success Coach, Speaker, and Bestselling Author of “Achieve with Grace: A guide to elegance and effectiveness in intense workplaces. She founded her coaching and consulting firm, Theresa Lambert Coaching & Consulting Inc., to help ambitious women succeed with more elegance and less struggle so they can lead with focus and nourish themselves to the top. Drawing from her nearly 20 years of experience in the hospitality industry and most recently her 6-year tenure as the General Manager of Nita Lake Lodge she brings both a real world view and proven applicable tools to support her clients. Theresa has been recognized as a business leader in Whistler’s Profiles of Excellence, featured in Thrive Global, Authority Magazine, Hotelier Magazine, and Beyourown, and spoken at Women in Hospitality Leadership events, including Empower Her. Originally from Stuttgart, Germany, Theresa now lives in Whistler, BC where you can most often find her on the golf course in the summer months or relaxing by a fireplace in winter.
https://www.theresalambertcoaching.com
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Transcript
Ever wonder what success actually means?
Theresa Lambert:How do you get
Blair Kaplan-Venables:it? And how do you keep it?
Theresa Lambert:We all want it yet sometimes it feels only some of us get to have it.
Blair Kaplan-Venables:t's be real for a hot minute.:Theresa Lambert:Can you put it in a box?
Blair Kaplan-Venables:How can you get it?
Theresa Lambert:Can people take it away? Or are you the one with the power?
Blair Kaplan-Venables:Does it mean the same to all of us? Or are we the ones that create it?
Theresa Lambert:From PGA golf bros to doctors, CEOs, entrepreneurs and spiritual mentors, we get together to meet with successful people from around the globe to dissect success for vibrant conversations and interviews. Make sure you click the subscribe button on the app store because each week we will drop a new episode to bust through the myths around success and dissect its true meaning. Who's ready for the most badass and massive uplevel in their business? It is back what's back momentum land Teresa's signature six month business and mentorship accelerator is now open for enrollment
Blair Kaplan-Venables:10 entrepreneurs will have the opportunity to join us exclusive experience that kicks off December 15. This VIP program includes two to one coaching, monthly masterminds and training sessions plus unlimited access to get your questions answered in real time.
Theresa Lambert:Imagine where you can take your business into six months that we will work together,
Blair Kaplan-Venables:ready to give your business the momentum you desire. Head to Teresa Lambert coaching comm backslash momentum to secure your coveted spot. Blair Katelyn Venables here with Teresa Lambert, we are here for another episode of dissecting success, something that the world has had to welcome into their life is the possibility of change. Change isn't just something that might happen, it does happen. And how do we as entrepreneurs adapt to change? How do we know when it's time for change? How do we know when we have to make a change? How do we know if we have enough change? Do you need change for parking? Do you need to change your outfit? Change is so, so relevant to us as entrepreneurs and today, we actually really want to focus on the concept of change with a focus on changing our minds. So fun,
Theresa Lambert:I think changing your mind is a big part of change. Because it's one of the few times we really instigate a change of trajectory, you know, like changing your mind on something to me, is huge, huge, because I used to, up until very recently, VT only just last month, not changed my mind on things that I had committed to, I would just move ahead with it or stick it out. Because I committed to it. And so it was almost like, as soon as you commit to something, you're not permitted to change your mind on the thing you're committed to. You know what I mean? So I never did. And now I'm like to know, this isn't working for me anymore. If you're changing your mind on something, if you don't want to do something anymore, if something feels complete, if you just need a change of scenery, even though you wanted to be in one place, and now you want to be in a different place. change your mind. Why can we change your mind change our minds? You know, to me, that is a honoring my own energy and Power Pivot move. Right there. That kind of changing your mind.
Blair Kaplan-Venables:Power Pivot move, Power Pivot move. Amazing. I love that. I never thought of it that way. I was just thinking as you're saying that like changing your mind is the ultimate ability to be in control. And there's so much that we don't have control of and if you feel like it's time to make a change. Make a Power Pivot. You can and I was just you know, we talked about this topic I dropped into me yesterday and today we're recording it and I was just thinking about out the concept of like, the way I used to business and that I, if I committed to something I committed to it, and if I, even if I couldn't give it 110%, I still did it. And I was thinking about that. And the growth I've had over the last few years even about really following my gut, following my intuition and knowing when it's time to end something, postpone something, change the way things are changed what's in my life. And I was thinking about, you know, we don't have a gun to our head. And then I remembered that when I first moved to Vancouver, I got robbed at gunpoint. Oh, my gosh, side story. And I was just like, I totally forgot about it. But my, one of my best friends lives in Vancouver, and I moved to Vancouver about a year after her and we lived in the same building. And like a couple days after I moved to Vancouver, we were so excited. We went, had some wine, and then we went grocery shopping like downtown Vancouver went to IGA, I think it was still light out. And we like got our groceries and we're about to pay and someone came in with a gun, and rob the cashier. And like the security guard dove behind us. That was scary. The cops drove us home, we had to leave our groceries there. And we went back the next day, and they gave us like a really nominal gift card for for for the trouble and our groceries. But I was just thinking about thinking about, like, how I'm not a gunpoint, and I really have sort of been at gunpoint, like not actually gunpoint, but pretty frickin close. And there's a huge difference to really being at gunpoint and having the ability to change because you are in control. Like what can you control?
Theresa Lambert:I'd love that you're bringing that up, Blair because I think one very big thing to realize it here. And now I'm going to get all brainy on us all is that our brain can't differentiate between you feeling like you're at gunpoint around something like you know, because our our brain like it's always designed to have our survival at heart. So it's always thinking about your survival so but it literally having a gun to you like being at gunpoint having literally physically that experience, and feeling as though a choice or changing your mind on something feels as life threatening. For whatever reason, our brain can differentiate. So we might actually experience that emotion around it, the pressure, the fear around that in a very similar way, which is crazy if you think about it, because one is actually like, your life might just going to end in a moment and the other is like you're literally just driving yourself completely bonkers on something that you just got to just change your mind and move forward. Right? Like, it's so simple. When you dissect it like that, and when you look at it like that, it's like of course I'm not at gunpoint. But let's face it when you're in the experience and you're having that stress response from this thought, I always say that is a not like a really really good indicator that there is something to walk through here for you right like a belief around what it means to change your mind. And that was a big I know for me, that was a big one because to me changing my mind on commitments meant I'm a bad person, I'm letting people down I'm you know, flaky and all this like crazy stuff, right? Even when sometimes the things I now change my mind on, people don't even know that has changed your mind on it. Like Only I know in my business, that I made a change and most people would notice unless they know about it. That is the messed up thing. But that belief that was holding like, like this whole idea that if you change your mind on something big, you change your mind in general, like you've made a decision and then you change your mind. That to me, that was a real like, no we don't do that we don't like that is not the proper behavior.
Blair Kaplan-Venables:You know, like that is not a compromise ation of our integrity. If anything, it's a nod to our integrity because we are making the change for a reason. We are making that change in that decision for a reason. And you know, just to talk about it. I was going to launch my group coaching program empowerment this month, but with moving and all grief I've been going through and just this week we put my mum's cat down, who was my cat and my mom's cat and my cat again. And, you know, it was it was heartbreaking, I just and I was thinking about it, when I kind of thought that it was time to put her down. I was like, You know what, I need to give myself some space. And October, I'm also publishing my my first iron resilient book, my second book, but the I'm resilient project, we're publishing our first book. And I just all of a sudden, like, why am I putting all this pressure on myself. And you know what social media is so important. And launching empowerment can postpone for a couple months, because this month should be all about the AI resilient project. And I made the decision to make a change. And there's absolutely nothing wrong with it, knowing that in three months from now, when I show up to launch that I will be able to give it 110% of my attention and energy, and not dividing it between launching, launching and publishing a book, a program. And I felt guilty about it. And I even talked to Teresa about it over sushi, because I actually saw her in person. And I talked to another friend about it. And I just felt really good about the decision. And I don't feel guilty. And this is maybe one of the first times I made such a big change in my business without the feeling of guilt. And maybe that's just a sign I'm growing. And we shouldn't put other people before us. And if we need to change something, because it's protecting us. Why are we so scared to do it?
Theresa Lambert:Yeah, and I think that's where the thing comes in. Right? But like you changed your mind. And then you made the change, which I think is Vidi Vidi key what most of us I think we get stuck into in the phase of like, we know that we desire to change our mind, we know it would actually hold our integrity more and and benefit as more to change our mind. But there is that thing, right? Like the invisible thing, right? Which called them beliefs or paradigms or, like whatever the heck you want to call them fears. It's all a similar like frequency of how we experienced that, right? But there was the thing, and then we're like, oh, no, I can't, I can't go there. And the thing that you just touched on I know was a big one for me. And that is the guilt, the guilt, and the shame on being like, Oh, my God, like, I changed my mind. And often times what I've realized is that the reason why you are desiring or having this change of mind and want to make the change is actually coming from the most positive intention. And you just mentioned that, right? Like you were going to fund a launch you empowerment program. You're also launching the iron resilience book right now, which is incredible. And here you are, and you've been in this grief cycle. And then you experienced another loss, which I don't even like. And that was I don't know how many times I've said this to you and on this podcast. But you know, it's so impressive to see that you're still even functioning. But also, you know, what I think is really important here, it's you becoming more vulnerable around the fact that you know what, this doesn't feel good to do both right now, because I just need a bit more space. And to claim that, and then to take the action without, you know, I'm letting people down or whatever. Is that really true, because I think that ultimately by you making this choice, and pivoting Power Pivot again, like it's a Power Pivot, because now everybody wins. You win because you get your space that I am resilient book wins, because it has your attention. So do the clients that you're currently still serving. And the people that are dropping into empowerment in a new year will win. Because they are getting you at your best not you get 70% because you're like that's all you can give to that right now. And I just think that that is so so powerful, right? And you just claim it and be like, you know what, I changed my mind. And then I made this decision because I know it's the best decision like when you actually get to the other side of this. You feel the power in it. Right? And it's like hell yes. Like, that feels really good. Like, you know, I just made a big decision like I had to commit it. I can share this I had committed to joining my coaches for another year and one of their coaching programs and free months in it just like it just feels complete. To me, and I'm still going on retreat to Costa Rica with them, which I'm super excited. And I'm still on some of like different programs that they're offering until the end of the year. And that feels really good. But I was like this feels complete, I just desiring right now to have a bit of a break, and to just focus on my thing and just keep, like, you know, just doing the things that I'm doing and putting my energy then, and putting my energy into my business and my clients in terms of just finding a groove at the level that I'm at. Because what I've realized is yes, we always want to up level more and up level more, but I was like, You know what, right now in this season of my life, I kind of just want to be steady in this at this level of business. And for me, that might be steady for six weeks. So steady will free ones. Like I can't tell you that yet. Right. But right now, that's what feels good. And so I worked through all the gills and all the shame around changing my mind, particularly to because I have so much love and respect. And because I enjoy working with my coaches so much I've invested crazy amounts in the last, you know, 14 months that we've been working together. But that was a huge one for me, I would have never, like I think even six months ago, I wouldn't have done that.
Blair Kaplan-Venables:And how brave you are for doing that, because it's a big decision to let go of the support you have while you're building because how do you know what it's going to be like without it, but you just said something that was really important, I want to bring it back. You felt like it was complete, you felt like it was complete. A lot of us entrepreneurs drag things on, do things longer than we need to or should, should to shun to, or should. I'm just making up my own words. But knowing it's time to make a change to change things up, is how we up level. It's how we give the business, our businesses the momentum they need to uplevel. And sometimes it's with coaching. And sometimes it's taking a break from coaching. Sometimes it's switching coaches, I have different mentors and different coaches for different things. And sometimes even in the same topic, because we all have such different experience. And sometimes we need a lot of that support. And sometimes we decide that information is complete right now and I have it and I'm going to implement it. And then we're going to see what happens. And it's braids. And that's the thing is making a change as a boss move. Like you want to show up as a leader, a thought leader make a change, change, change is good. You know, I have a friend who has a job. And she was telling me how like, it's, you know, she's an employee, but they have all these really archaic, like dress code rules that probably date back for decades and decades. Like on certain days, men have to wear ties and they just got rid of that banana
Theresa Lambert:that screams It's time for change. But then I also get that, you know, the company as a brand, right? I don't obviously know what company it is. So, you know,
Blair Kaplan-Venables:it just Yeah, it does, it doesn't matter. But it just like thinking about something that like doesn't change or took decades to make a very small change to feeling what's in your gut and making a drastic change, like, you know, a potential, you know, six figure program I'm launching I'm postponing till the new year. And I'm okay with that. Because it was like, do I need them? Like, do I need the money and then I remember I'm mad at myself like I don't do things for the money I do things that are going to help up level and empower my community. And the money is a bonus because I do a lot of giving back like my I'm resilient project isn't a business, I lose money if anything like I you know, I don't make money from it. And the more money I make with my business, the more I'm able to fund the I'm resilient project. And the more I can do with helping people be more resilient. And so it's this thing where if I make a change, it impacts everything. And this change positively enhances the I am resilient project and it's not a financial injection. Its capacity, which is a huge currency in business is capacity. Right? And I think that's funny. I didn't even mean to do that. But like talking about change and currency. Look at me go. I just think you know If we don't have the capacity to do something, make a change. If you don't like what's going on, make a change, if you're not happy, make a change, there's nothing to be feared, feared about in the realm of change. And maybe we just need to rename that energy into excitement. Well, they say
Theresa Lambert:that fear is excitement about a breath. So if you have feel around changing your mind, or making a change, just start breathing through it. Right, and you will find excitement on the other side of it. And that's very powerful. You know, that's really powerful. But I think what we also, you know, like, I think both of the things that we've changed our mind on recently, both you and I, for different reasons, right, you desired more capacity in space. I just literally was like, it's complete right now. It feels complete, like, what can I do? It feels complete, right. And, you know, I think it to like, it was met with the most love and kindness. And of course, if it feels complete, it's it's okay to move on rate. And in the coaching industry, just this doesn't always happen, right. And it made me think about flexibility and freedom and choice, and the importance of those free things for me, and how much they've been highlighted in my life in the last couple of months. I think for many of us, um, and, you know, the thing is always like, from all these things, we come to the other side, and there was excitement. But you know, what excites me most about moving through this as a leader, and changing our minds and making these power moves, is that every time we do that, we learn something. And that love experience we get to pass on, like we did just now on this podcast, and everybody listening and to normalize, changing our minds and making a change. If you need more space, if you desire more capacity, if something feels complete, walk away from it, if something doesn't feel good anymore, break up with it. Like, you know, I think we get so hung up on this whole thing of changing our minds, that, you know, we make the decision bigger than it has to be. Just change your mind. It start with changing your mind, one, change your mind, get clear on what you're changing your mind on to take action, right? Like change them, change your mind. Get clear, do it consciously, can I change your mind on this, this is what I'm going to do. Okay, boom, and just go do it and just see what happens. So this to me, is a big fat invitation, and permission slip, to shake things up in your business, in your life, in your career, to start shaking things up a little bit and change your mind on stuff. And just start to notice how you getting on the other side of it actually holds far more excitement than disappointment.
Blair Kaplan-Venables:So listeners out there. What have you been thinking about during this episode? What in your life? Are you ready to change? What change Are you going to make? We feel like this episode is complete. And I think this is a good point to say thank you so much for spending time dissecting success with us. And we look forward to doing it with you next time.
Theresa Lambert:That's a wrap for another episode of dissecting success. enjoyed this episode. Make sure to subscribe to black cap on Venables and Theresa Lambert's podcast dissecting success on the App Store.